Fool For Love, is going to play at Beowulf Alley Theatre this month. Check out their website for details. Now I like my doses of Sam Shepard few and far between but I must take in this one. Which brings me to my cause today. I am long overdue to write about many of the wonderful people working in Theatre around Tucson and Mike Sultzbach is one of them. Mike is directing this production.
This being a blog, with free-flowing thoughts of my own, if and when I mention others as I have on occasion, its strictly from my own experiences and opinions. The Patricks, Bills, Cindys and others of the world that I have touched upon in writings here, have through their personalities, deeds, works, words, etc, inspired or excited me in one way or another, made me feel good about myself and/or humanity, the world. So whether brief or in-depth, as I write, its what I recall in the moment. I suppose what I am trying to say is that I'm not conducting interviews or even trying to place some objective perspective or story in front of you. Its what I think, feel, believe, recollect.
Back to Mike. In the brief time I worked with Mike (on a production of The Birthday Party where we met) and in the subsequent passing moments of seeing each other here and there, I have to tell you that there is always a bit of an inside joke present. I may or may not be a skilled enough writer here and now today to impart it, and let you in on this joke - but I'll try. Hopefully it will be apparent in my attempt to reveal it that Mike is a great guy - in the best and most exciting sense of that of that overused and mundane little phrase - a great guy. Emphasis on great. He has a wonderfully alert and engaging personality. He is creative and talented and totally humble. He exerts and asserts himself as needed with charm and intensity as brilliant men often do. He is educated, accomplished, caring and capable all around. And every time I have seen him, I smile and feel glad to have been around.
And the joke is that Mike has seen me in some compromised ways. Nothing too terrible mind you - I'm not that kind of person. I don't steal or lie, don't seek to take advantage of anyone, don't try to impose myself too much and always try to do what seems good and just and right. But...occasionally I forget my lines or attempt grandiose moments on stage, drink too much (rarely but so be it), flirt incessantly, and sometimes miss a belt loop or two. When those moments happen its wonderful to have a Mike around, as in a Mike Sultzbach. I'm sure Mike can tell a funny story or two or three about me - and that would be o.k. with me. I'm not too proud, or too worried or too insecure to not laugh about myself and the things I may have (allegedly) done. And I'm not saying Mike has or does tell stories about me , but if he did, I believe he would do me "justice," with just the right emphasis and without malice, etc. And I would laugh hearing it for sure.
A few years ago, three, four, I don't know with certainty, Howard Allen wore me down and talked me into auditioning for him for The Birthday Party, by Harold Pinter, which he was directing for Beowulf Alley Theatre. For at least ten years prior to that, I had worked, artistically speaking, with a very small number of people, all who had associations with Tucson Art Theatre. It was a purposeful and conscious endeavor on my part - to not seek an individual "career" as an actor, but rather to be part of a collective group of artists working together over a long period of time. That was my satisfaction, my identity and my reference. But Howard was a persistent and encouraging man, and I like him a lot anyways - so I did it. And he freakin cast me! So what could I do. I was flattered and appreciated it really.
My image and memory of the first rehearsals for the Birthday Party include actors arriving late, eating food onstage during rehearsal, chit-chatting incessantly about any and everything, manners of seeming carelessness, and a good deal of confusion about the play and the organization of roles and duties. Right or wrong it was all very different from what I was used to under the closeness and dedication of the Tucson Art Theatre group. There was this one exception though. This guy named Mike was always there early, always focused, always polite and good natured, always prepared and ready work, and so did. Now let me say I grew to adore and admire everyone in the cast and crew, but during the early stages of work I was perplexed by the attitudes and approaches. Except by Mike's.
Howard provided excellent questions and guidelines in his work with me, which then gave me full reign and inspiration to run wild and free with my role. At least in so far as much as one can do in only three weeks worth of rehearsal. (I know some of you feel that is sufficient and plentiful time - but I don't). But try I did. I attempted to create a psycho-physical characterization that gave spirit and meaning and perspective to the hidden but suffocating and threatening aspects of life embodied in the script, and our human attempts to overcome and/or embrace those. Those attempts, per my character, included indulgences, fetishes, and extremes, tempered within an impeccable and gracious attitude - leading to imbalance at times, physically and mentally, emotionally and psychologically, and ensuing attempts to regain composure, control, balance - a never ending cycle. But what my work as an actor did to my co-actors in this case, at times, was to elicit the "what the fuck is this method actor doing?" refrain. Though not in a malicious way.
(I swear this post is about Mike and not me...I'm just on a mini-tangent).
For the record, and to dispel some myths, those of us actors who work under the influence of Stanislavsky and Strasberg, "System" and "Method" - We do not try and become our characters. That is insanity. We do not hope for or work to have spirits from another dimension inhabit us and influence us. We do not try to reincarnate. We do not try to literally believe in the fictional world of the play. We do try and create what may be called a "theatrical belief" whereby our bodies function in a sense biologically "as if" the fictional circumstances were real but with our full everyday consciousness as a person and artist knowing full well that its all make believe. It is a dual activity and awareness. It takes a training of the body and mind, and cooperation of full sensibilities in order to achieve certain levels and details of behavior this way.
It takes time and effort to integrate this living material with words and ideas from a page (a script). Suffice to say that in this time with The Birthday Party, I was having my share of both success and difficulty in this endeavor. And without a unified understanding and approach from our entire cast, things were at times confusing for everyone. For example (o.k. now I'm on a longer tangent) there is a vocabulary that is commonly used and prevalent in most rehearsals that is made up of words and phrases that describe how things should look and seem to the outsider, the spectator, as understood and envisioned by the director. Sayings like "there is a build there" (meaning it should increase in volume, speed and intensity perhaps), "cheat out" (meaning the spectators need to see you or a part of you better), or "that's a transition" (a change of subject or action or activity), dominate. They denote and suggest generalities of behavior by the actor based on a logic that is sprung from the viewpoint of outsider. (A whole way of working in fact, "Viewpoints," is based on this directors perspective). The assumption is that the actors, in their worldliness and professionalism, will somehow translate and justify and jive those generalities with their perception of their characters and behave accordingly. Actors are supposed to "make it work." I don't offer that up as a critique. But rather to further explain a difference. I was entering these rehearsals from a world where the vocabulary was the perspective of the actor in specifics, reasons and desires and means of creating behaviors of characters. I knew the lingo of The Birthday Party rehearsal just fine - I wasn't such a novice or sheltered person to be ignorant of it, but there was a big adjustment that I went through where I was like "oh yeah, this is how it is! I remember all this stuff!" Weird to say the least.
In my moments of difficulty, some self-created and imposed, others just a product of our different approaches and intents, others constraints of time and place, there was Mike, patient and recognizing and always in just the right way, the most respectful and cordial, but with his wicked sense of humor when necessary and appropriate, reminding me of what went wrong and why and offering any help if needed or wanted. He was that way for all of us. And in my mind he became the glue and the thread that kept us all together. He was reason, advice and encouragement, on stage and off.
Sometime later Mike became the chair or the leader of a volunteer artistic committee overseeing Beowulf Alley Theatres artistic endeavors. It seems to me that when these type of committees form they usually don't last - something happens or someone emerges often through force and will as the dictator/person in charge. I don't pretend to know the particulars of how this committee worked and functioned but I know they have had a wonderful success based on the sheer volume of activity and people involved at Beowulf. I can only imagine (Beth and Bill's dedication and work aside for a moment) that it is because Mike was there - the right person at the right place at the right time, steadfast and capable and reassuring. I don't know if he still does that job or what the status is, and I haven't tried to look it up even now as I write. But I'm glad to see and hear of Mike directing this show. So I must go.
I'm leaving the time I drank too much tequila (which Mike brought to the party) and a couple of other "stories" aside - I've decided. Its better that if you know Mike or meet him someday, to let him tell you if he wants or will. I tell a pretty good story but Mike is masterful.
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